"Write" Mindsets: 4 helpful mental habits for creative writers
Photo by Katrina Wright on Unsplash
I love to set goals.
It’s part of the fabric of who I am.
While I don’t set yearly goals, I do like to set 12-week goals, or “12-week years” (a concept from Brian P. Moran’s brain).
But I’ve discovered recently that my ability to set goals is less important than how I approach my goals.
This past year, I’ve switched my focus from goal-setting— to "mind-setting."
To meet our goals, it helps immensely if we start with the “write” mindsets in place.
(Please excuse the 🧀 pun.)
Our mindsets are our mental habits. They’re particular ways of thinking.
What are your mental habits as a writer?
Do you spend a lot of time:
Doubting your creative abilities?
Focusing on what others will think of your work?
Procrastinating on your writing goals?
Finding it difficult to craft complex characters?
Then it might be time to look at your mindsets as a writer.
Here are 4 ways you can reshape your mindsets as a writer—and aim for your creative goals with the strongest foundation possible.
Embrace a Growth Mindset
Do you have plans to try something new?
If, like me, you're thinking of venturing out of your comfort zone in some way, then now is a great time to check in and see if you have a "growth" mindset in place.
Having a growth mindset (versus a fixed mindset) is a buzzy idea, especially in educational spaces. But while the idea is buzzy, the meaning can get a bit fuzzy. So, let’s clarify.
Every human has beliefs about what they “can” and “can’t” do. That means we’re all a delightful smörgåsbord of growth and fixed mindsets.
A fixed mindset is when we believe certain abilities can’t be improved—that a skillset of ours is “fixed” and impossible to change.
Examples of fixed mindsets:
🙅🏻♀️ “I’m either good at writing or I’m not.”
🙅🏻♀️ “It’s too late for me to learn this.”
🙅🏻♀️ “Why try if I’m just going to fail?”
🙅🏻♀️ “I always have a hard time with…”
🙅🏻♀️ “I’m just not good at…”
A growth mindset is when we believe our abilities have room to grow and improve—with effort, dedication, and impactful strategies.
Examples of growth mindsets:
🌳 “I can improve my writing skills with effort and practice.”
🌳 “It’s never too late to learn something new.”
🌳 “It’s okay if I fail. Failure gives me an opportunity to learn.”
🌳 “It might take effort and help, but I can grow my painting skills.”
🌳 “I’m going to try a new way of doing this.”
🌳 “I can’t do that… yet.”
As Carol Dweck wrote in her book, Mindset:
“The passion for stretching yourself and sticking to it, even (or especially) when it’s not going well, is the hallmark of the growth mindset. This is the mindset that allows people to thrive during some of the most challenging times in their lives.”
Two years ago, I tried pottery for the first time.
I was petrified.
I hated failing. I hated being “bad” at something. And I knew I was going to be epically bad at pottery.
In my first class, I watched my teacher (who, funnily enough, is also named Monika) spin clay on the wheel.
As I watched, this was my exact thought process:
"Why am I here?! I'm going to get clay everywhere and any pot I throw will fly off the wheel and maybe I should just quit and leave before anyone sees me and why on this planet did I sign up for this?!!"
Luckily, I stayed. I started throwing clay on the wheel. And I kept showing up to classes.
Spoiler: yes, I was terrible at pottery.
Also, spoiler: I got better with practice. (A lot of practice.)
Monika (my instructor, not alter ego) said to us in that first class:
“Just remember: you’re all clay babies. It’s tough to learn something new. It’ll take time before you can throw a pot on the wheel. But you’ll get there.”
When we set a goal or try anything new, we're "clay babies" in some small way. We're brand-new. We don't really know what we're doing.
And that can feel scary.
But having a growth mindset—and remembering that we can improve with time and patience and practice—can help us continue when we're struggling the most.
🤹🏻♀️ Mindset Magic: Practice a “growth” reframe.
When do you say—out loud or in your head—“I can’t do that”?
Consider how you can reframe your “I can’t” to a “not yet.”
If you're interested, Psychology Today has an interesting article with different ways to help develop a growth mindset.
Practicing a growth mindset takes time and patience.
But I invite you to consider how you can choose a growth mindset—and aim yourself toward that expansion when trying something new.
Focus on What You Can Control
When I was 20, I went on the quintessential “find-yourself” Europe trip with my sister.
We spent two months traipsing from country to country, spending 2-3 days in a city before launching to the next.
Before we left, I created a massive Excel spreadsheet with:
The exact dates we’d spend in each city
The exact trains we would take to get to each city
The exact foods and adventures we’d have in each city
About three weeks into our trip, a train strike started in Italy. We arrived into the country—and were promptly stranded.
(Surprisingly, my Excel spreadsheet had not taken this into account 🤔)
There’s a picture of me from that day. My eyes are red (from a lot of crying)—and I’m holding a huge gelato cone.
That was the day I realized no matter how hard I plan, life has a sneaky way of tipping the scales.
But—that was also the day I realized derailed plans are an opportunity to re-focus on what is in my control.
That particular September day? While we couldn’t get on our scheduled train, we did seek out and find the best gelato shop in Ventimiglia🍦
In our lives, there are a lot of things we can’t control.
Examples: Italian train strikes. Snow storms. Pandemics.
But there are many things that are within our control. And choosing to focus on what is within our control is a helpful mindset shift, especially for writers and freelancers.
About a month ago, I thought about two big parts of my life: freelancing and creative writing.
I then made two lists:
What I can’t control
What I can control
When I’m freelancing, I can’t control:
How much work is assigned to me
If clients will like my work and hire me again
How much income I’ll make on a month-to-month basis
When I’m freelancing, I can control:
Whether I meet every freelance deadline on time
How I explain and hold boundaries with clients
If I respond gracefully to feedback from clients
Whether I reach out to new, potential clients on a regular basis
If I learn how to budget with a variable income
When I’m writing and sharing my work, I can’t control:
If readers will love or criticize my work
If my submissions are picked up by magazines or an agent
If one day I’ll ever find a publishing house for my (not-written-yet) historical romance novel
When I’m writing and sharing my work, I can control:
How often I make time to write
Whether I reach out to fellow writers and ask for feedback on my work
If I join writing groups to practice my skills and discover new ideas
If I choose to write with my self-compassionate inner coach
If I focus on enjoying the process and journey of creative writing
I find I need to constantly remind myself: Focus on what you can control.
It’s not a magical cure-all, of course. But it helps me feel lighter—and remember that I can find a gelato cone when plans skid off-track.
And, when I consider what is in my control, I discover I always have choices.
🤹🏻♀️ Mindset Magic: Write your “control” lists.
Consider a challenge you’re facing right now. Then:
Write a list of what you can’t control in this situation.
Write a list of what is within your control.
If you feel like it, tear up the list of what you can’t control. Put big strikethrough lines through the uncontrollable stuff.
(I’m all about symbolic gestures.)
Let it go. And then focus on what is within your control 🤗
Go Slow and Don't Stop
I’m a big fan of Mark Manson’s “Do Something” Principle.
We often think we need to feel inspired to get motivated. We think once we’re feeling motivated, then we’ll act.
We will finally write that television script. We will finally do that deep-clean of the house. We will finally send out fifty cold pitches to potential clients.
Manson says we often think the process unfolds this way:
Inspiration ➡️ Motivation ➡️ Action
But Manson argues that action actually helps us feel motivated. Action helps us get inspired.
Manson says it’s a mindset shift to see the process this way:
Action ➡️ Inspiration ➡️ Motivation
Have you been procrastinating something big?
The solution—according to Manson—is to “just do something.”
Have a long book to write? ➡️ Just start writing some bullet points for your introduction.
Have an entire house to clean? ➡️ Just start pulling out cleaning supplies for the bathroom.
Have a resume to update? ➡️ Just start by opening up the document and picking a font.
The point is to just get started. Because, once we’re in motion, it’s easier to keep our momentum going.
This is my go-to motto: Go slow—and don’t stop.
I heard this motto first on a MuchelleB video.
Some weeks, writing is a huge struggle.
On those weeks, I set an intention to just sit down and “do something” with my writing.
And I give myself permission to go slowly.
Every morning, I’ll sit my butt down in front of my computer. And I type.
Sometimes I just write down bullet points. Other days I simply look up new ways to say “unique.”
But I keep going. I keep “doing something.”
Our human brains are motivated by progress.
When we feel like we’re making headway on something, it helps us to keep going.
If you’re having a day where you just. don’t. want. to. write… but there’s a deadline looming or this is an important writing project for you…
Shift your mindset toward prioritizing action. Slow action.
🤹🏻♀️ Mindset Magic: Revisit your writing routine.
You don’t have to write every day to be a writer. I certainly don’t.
But making time to write every week does help you take action on your writing goals. Feel free to give yourself a permission slip to write slowly—and just keep going.
If you’re looking to write slowly toward one of your goals, I highly recommend setting up a writing routine for yourself.
Unless I have a (rare) meeting, I write every Monday to Thursday from 9:30am to 12:30pm.
This time in the morning is when I’m at my freshest—and most creative. This is when I choose to show up for my writing.
If you're interested, I've put together a workbook to help walk you through my 3-step checklist to creating a sustainable writing routine:
Choose Curiosity
Ernest Hemingway once wrote, “The writer’s job is not to judge, but to seek to understand.”
One of my core values is curiosity.
I love learning. I love asking questions. I love getting to know new places and people better.
But—my willingness to be curious definitely hits roadblocks. I sometimes find it hard to remain curious when I disagree with someone's choices.
However, I do firmly believe we always have a choice when it comes to getting curious.
Making space to be curious, to try to understand others and their decisions… for me, I see that as more and more important in my creative and community work.
Everyone has their own set of values, their own history, and their own perspective.
And their choices reflect that unique worldview.
I believe a willingness to be curious is key part of being a creative writer and storyteller.
When we write with a curious mindset, we:
Are open to fresh perspectives and feedback from others.
Write characters with greater depth, who have experiences different than our own.
Tell stories with a more understanding—and, hopefully, inclusive—lens.
Experiment with new frameworks and ideas.
Ask more questions when we're feeling stuck.
Feel more at ease with failing—because it’s an opportunity to learn.
My favourite stories are ones that help me understand the world better. Those are the stories that change and reframe my life.
I invite you to consider if there are times when you can shift from judgement and instead choose curiosity—in your most difficult conversations, in the stories you write, and in your view of the world.
I can’t say this with certainty for everyone… but I know when I approach anything with curiosity—that’s when creative and compassionate change happens for me.
🤹🏻♀️ Mindset Magic: Write 10 reasons for choices you don’t understand.
I love this podcast episode with Jesse Mecham and Ramit Sethi (author of I Will Teach You to Be Rich).
Halfway through the episode, Mecham and Sethi chatted about how they both used to be quite ‘judgy’ about the spending habits of others.
They were quick to judge what they deemed "outlandish" purchases. They’d look at certain sales and roll their eyes.
But both dudes had decided to let go of this attitude.
Instead, they’d decided to get curious about the “why” behind these "extravagant" purchases.
Sethi said,
“I would challenge everyone listening, take one thing that, when you heard someone spend money on it, your first reaction was, 'That’s ridiculous.’
"And flip that from disparagement to curiosity… and then say ‘Why might they have done that?’ And come up with at least 10 reasons.”
This struck such a chord with me. Disparagement ➡️ Curiosity? Yes, let’s.
Sethi’s “10 reasons list” is a great creative exercise.
Don’t understand why someone (or a story character) made a certain choice?
Write 10 possible reasons why. Stretch your imagination.
Writing 10 reasons makes for a long list. It’s harder than it seems. It’ll stretch you—creatively and compassionately—but it’s worth trying.
Gentle reminder: Reframing our mindsets takes time.
It takes practice to reshape mental habits that we’ve had for a while.
But I firmly believe it’s worth the effort. ✨
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Oh hey there, I’m Monika!
(she/her) I’m a big fan of compassionate creativity, intentional living, and freshly-popped popcorn. I hope this article helped you reshape some of your mindsets. If you have any questions, feel free to send me an email. I love to hear from fellow writers!
